My baby girl is now six months old. This is a pretty big deal. For me it’s been feeling almost like a birthday. So many things are changing again. With parenting the minute you get good at something and have it down packed it’s time to learn something new. My boyfriend and I have evolved as a couple and we have never been closer and more in tune with each other. I honestly could say that this is the happiest I have ever been in my life. This happiness has come with many sacrifices.
Originally I wanted to breast feed for 3 months. I went to a breast feeding course held by the hospital and after that I changed my goal to 6 months. Even 6 months felt like it would be a hard goal to reach but my boyfriend really wanted me to do what was best for her. A year is ideally what is recommended best but I thought to myself I don’t think I can give up a whole year of my life doing this. I’m already committing to roughly 40 weeks being pregnant. Well it’s been 6 months and I am still going strong exclusively breast feeding my daughter. And I LOVE IT! Yes I love it. People find it hard to believe every time they ask me “Oh my God, you are still breast feeding your baby?” with a confused and nearly disgusted face, and I proudly say YES! Motherhood has taught me to be completely selfless for my daughter. I would do anything to keep her happy and healthy. I have given up my social life for the most part for this. When I have to feed my daughter in public people stare and point at me. Some even try to take pictures to probably upload on social media or send to a friend mocking me. At first I was so sensitive. At first I cried almost every day. Now I am so much stronger both emotionally and physically. As a mother I feel I can conquer most anything thrown at me. I even had a customer I helped the other day straight up tell me I was and idiot for listening to my doctor about breast feeding and that I was doing my child harm. I won’t lie that hit me to the core. I’ve noticed many moms judging one another and being harsh. Each parent has to make decisions every day about raising their kid. Those decisions are their own and should be respected. Yes you are entitled to your opinion but sometimes you really need to just shut the hell up and keep it to yourself. Being a mom is hard enough it doesn’t help to be bullied in a sense by another parent that simply doesn’t understand why you are breast feeding, or chose not to vaccinate your kids, or what ever the case may be. I myself was guilty of this. A lot more so in the beginning of parenthood and then after being judged and insulted myself I realized that I wouldn’t want to inflict that shame or pain on anyone else because of something they believed to be best for their child. I saw a video that really helped me understand this and they used the hashtag #endmommywars.
This is near and dear to my heart now and I want to bring awareness to this. Any one that knows me knows I’m a tough woman and I don’t take crap from anyone. I would consider myself confrontational but when I had complete strangers tell me their unwanted advice and point blank insult my choices as a mother I found myself drawing a blank and not saying much back to defend myself. I see now that I don’t need to fight back or start a war with then but instead respectfully stand up for myself and my decision and move on to something else. Your decisions are your own and unless we asked for your opinion please do us a favor and shut the F up. Let’s respect one another and support each other. Let’s not judge and belittle one another. We are mothers, fathers, parents to these tiny little humans that is hard enough. Enjoy every minute and don’t be afraid to let some one know their opinion isn’t necessary. You shouldn’t look at a mother and judge but instead understand that she is doing what she is doing for her own reasons. Remind yourself of the times someone has made you feel not so great and instead say good job.
Has anyone else experienced this?